Looked over models of well done DEJs.
Finally, finally, finally reviewed punctuation packet #3. Yippee.
Began worksheet on improving writing -- sentences every which way. No more See Spot Run!
Try your own online. Fun way to practice.
As an example, courtesy of The Owl at Purdue Writing Lab, vary the rhythm by alternating short and long sentences.
"Several sentences of the same length can make for bland writing. To enliven paragraphs, write sentences of different lengths. This will also allow for effective emphasis.
Example: The Winslow family visited Canada and Alaska last summer to find some native American art. In Anchorage stores they found some excellent examples of soapstone carvings. But they couldn't find a dealer selling any of the woven wall hangings they wanted. They were very disappointed when they left Anchorage empty-handed.
Revision: The Winslow family visited Canada and Alaska last summer to find some native American art, such as soapstone carvings and wall hangings. Anchorage stores had many soapstone items available. Still, they were disappointed to learn that wall hangings, which they had especially wanted, were difficult to find. Sadly, they left empty-handed."
Fixing short sentences by sentence combining, courtesy of Prof. Siegel, Mt. Mary College. "Sentence combining is just what it sounds like. Often, a series of short sentences can be combined into a longer, more effective sentence."
For example, consider the following paragraph (this is taken from Writing with a Purpose by Joseph Trimmer):
Last weekend I saw a science fiction film. Three friends went with me. The film focused on the experiments of a mad doctor. He altered his patients' lives by manipulating their dreams.
In the sample paragraph above the short sentences, all having the same noun-verb-object pattern, create a choppy effect. Here are the sentences "combined" into one, more economical sentence:
Last weekend three friends and I saw a science fiction film in which a mad doctor altered his patients' lives by manipulating their dreams.
Fixing short sentences by sentence combining, courtesy of Prof. Siegel, Mt. Mary College. "Sentence combining is just what it sounds like. Often, a series of short sentences can be combined into a longer, more effective sentence."
For example, consider the following paragraph (this is taken from Writing with a Purpose by Joseph Trimmer):
Last weekend I saw a science fiction film. Three friends went with me. The film focused on the experiments of a mad doctor. He altered his patients' lives by manipulating their dreams.
In the sample paragraph above the short sentences, all having the same noun-verb-object pattern, create a choppy effect. Here are the sentences "combined" into one, more economical sentence:
Last weekend three friends and I saw a science fiction film in which a mad doctor altered his patients' lives by manipulating their dreams.
HW: Weds. Vocabulary quiz, lessons 1-6.
Thurs: Analy guidance counselors visit to get ready for course choices for next year.
Fri: Second double-entry journal due. Three more DEJs. Half of the book should be read.
